Celebrations

I’m really good at celebrating.

I love champagne and balloons and confetti and glitter and high-fives and fist-bumps and heart-emojis and hugs.

I love celebrating your wins and your milestones and moments big and small that make you smile. It makes me smile too. I’m working on celebrating me.

I just had a big birthday, and my family and friends did a lovely job celebrating me and for that I’m so grateful. It was a milestone birthday, and for months I vacillated between throwing myself a party or taking myself on vacation or buying myself something big.

I couldn’t decide.

I didn’t plan anything.

We had no dinner reservations but we had an idea of a favorite place to go, so tentatively Joey and I planned that.

So the day came and I received flowers and champagne and cupcakes and cards. Our original dinner plan failed and we had to randomly end up somewhere else and the pivot was wonderful. We had margaritas and laughed our tails off and all of it was so warm and fuzzy and I’ll remember it always.

What I will equally remember always is when Elsie and Leo not-so-causally shared with the waitress that It’s our mom’s birthday!" at which point I painted a pretend smile on my face and did my best not to recoil from the impending attention I was about to receive.

That is not my thing.

And it happened, a restaurant full of boisterous singing and a sombrero placed on my head. I was sitting across from the kids and through their eyes, the light and the love and the precious ownership of celebrating me that they had, it was palpable. I could taste that stronger than the fried-ice-cream that was to follow.

My first instinct when the waitress was summoned and those words were said, It’s our mom’s birthday, was to quiet them. My first instinct when the sombrero was brought over was to politely decline. My first instinct instead of laughing through it was to bring my hands to my face and run for cover behind my palms, embarrassed of my own celebration.

But it hit me right then, I’m raising people who love celebrating others, too. They will cheer for the wins, big and small, of the ones they love. They will bring attention to special moments and make sure hugs and high-fives are given out and they will sprinkle confetti and sing loudly and congratulate people and they are learning to lift up others. They have learned how great that feels, just like I have.

So, I smiled through the embarrassment and you know what? I loved it.

Kids love birthdays and days that are all about them. At what point in the journey of growing up do we begin deflecting and expecting less? Do we want that for our kids? That one day they wake-up and deem themselves a little bit less worthy of celebrating a birthday or a big win or a special moment? I don’t. I forever want Elsie and Leo to hand me their spelling test, or whatever it is as they grow up, and expect me to put it on the fridge under a magnet where it shall live forever in celebration.

I guess the lesson is here that it’s important to know and to remember, we have the responsibility of being a walking, talking, living example to those around us and especially the young people around us. They’re always watching and listening and hopefully, they are celebrating too.

Happy birthday, me. And thanks to Elsie and Leo for making it so special. I’ll never forget it.

xo